Shoes and clothing damage our ability to survive naked in the wilderness.*

* Which is a situation we’ve all found ourselves in.

I am completely fed up with boys clothes. Who knew that the biggest drama I would have with a boy is the constant quest to find decent things to put on his body?

Shirt: Target (on clearance for $1.88) / Shorts: Hundreds & Thousands @ Kmart / Jumper: H&T @ Kmart / Shoes: H&T @ Kmart (I bought two pairs)

The stores that are available to me now, like Target and Big W, sell cheap clothes. The most you’ll pay for something is about $20, and that’s for things like thick jumpers. Cheap is all I need for my little growing person who has no need for long-lasting quality.

Shirt: Target / Shorts: Dymples @ Big W / Shoes: Coles (really)

But. Just because I need cheap, doesn’t mean I need uggers. My choices for Devin’s clothes in these stores can be broken down into four categories – sports, machinery, licensed characters and lame words like ‘Mummy’s little rockstar’.

Shirt: Mambo @ Big W / Shorts: H&T @ Kmart.

Most of Devin’s clothes are plain block colours or striped because I have no other option. I had quite a bit of luck at Kmart with shoes, checked shorts and graphic shirts that were cute but not twee, but there is no Kmart in our current location.

Shirt: Dymples @ Big W / Pants: Bonds @ Big W / Shoes: Munchkin @ Big W.

There is a Pumpkin Patch here, and another boutique store, but they’re unreasonably expensive and too preppy for my tastes. I don’t really get the big deal about Pumpkin Patch.

Shirt: ? gift
Shirt: ? gift / Pants: H&T @ Kmart

Of course I look online, and while I have slightly better luck finding things I like, finding things I can afford? *insert thumbs down and raspberry noise* I mean, $40 for a kids t-shirt? Are you serious? I don’t like paying that for a shirt for me, and I’m not perpetually growing.

Shirts: H&T @ Kmart

The thing is, I know I’m not the only one having this problem. All you have to do is look at the online stock levels of good boys products compared to girls to realise how desperate people are to snap up something nice for little boys. There is a glut of pretty things for girls. Everywhere. And it’s not all pink. But, for some reason, manufacturers still haven’t picked up on the unbalance.

Shirts: Dymples @ Big W / Pants: Dymples @ Big W (I think) / Broom: $5 @ Bunnings

So I’m at a loss, now. Should I take up screen printing and sewing? Actually, I would like to do both of those things, but because I want to, not because no one seems to be able to make tasteful childrens clothing.

Shirt: Target (clearance) / Shorts: H&T @ Kmart / Baby duck @ Japanese gardens

Maybe I should just tie an old singlet on him for a joke and then have him throw a tantrum when I try to take it off because he actually likes it.

Oh, wait, that already happened.

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